i just feel really rotten today and yesterday was really tough too.

i heard from work again last week, again with the stupid newsletter stuff, this time i did it over the weekend and sent it so i've heard again from them all sorts of stupid chatty stuff.

all my anxiety of life is back. i slept ok last night but i'm still just drained today. anxiety and depression and things still seem to be getting worse instead of better. i have another appt in 2 days so that will get me through this week.

it is just so completely draining having to take this still a day at a time, an hour at a time, i thought by now it would at least be a little bit easier. still don't hear from people, still feel alone and isolated, it is getting harder and harder for me to call people because the rejection hurts more and more.

i just want to get to a point where i am functional again. right now i feel as if i might as well be bedridden in a hospital, let them put me in a facility and feed me every day with the tv on.

i really want to work past this it is just so hard.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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