I think I experience mixed episodes almost everyday. Sometimes I will be driving and I will feel like I have the most wonderful life and I can do anything...it only takes one glance at a man and a young girl at bus stop and I began sink inside I think about my single father and how when he was poor we would ride the bus or walk to the grocery store and then I am dying inside with loneliness it only takes a whole 30 seconds to go from elation to complete heartache. I don't know what it is. I feel like I can never escape myself. Does this sound at all similiar to your experiences? I wonder myself about it. I don't really know what happens to me. My shrink just diagnosed me with bipolar disorder and i admit I feel a little traumatized by the label. I can't even get myself to take my medication because of the stigma attached to the diagnosis. I am professional. I have job and a relationship and a dog. I am not some crazy looney lady.