Sannah: Yes, I always want more love. I want to bottle it up and savor it. I've told my Ts that in bits and pieces but never as emphatically as NOW with this T. I need to keep telling her, and having her accept my feelings.

I myself have to accept my feelings, and that I'm not BAD for having them. I feel like I'm bad to love her and to be in love with her. It doesn't feel good. We started discussing how I feel bad at times when you'd think I'd feel good. I don't where the "badness" comes from. I don't think I'm allowed to love her but she told me I am. But feeling "in love" I'm not sure about.

I wish it were Tuesday already so I could talk to my T about it. Maybe the EMDR stirred up these feelings. The way she looked triggered me too. Her going away also did. I have to go distract myself for awhile now.