ohh wow ((WePow)) thank you so much for this response...this is exactly it-I completely understand at the mental level that he can manage his schedule that he is a grown man who makes his own decisions and all that...but the little girl inside of me is terrified that he will not be there for me like I need him to be...I've tried running away from him a couple of times now (and we have only been doing sessions since June!! I also am afraid he will get annoyed with me and even though he promised he isn't leaving me-I'm afraid he secretly wants me to go away b/c I'm annoying. I feel embarrassed about the hug thing-but I'm glad I was honest with him-and I'm eager to work through some of these things with him next session. We are working very hard on my ability to hold the "both/and" concepts-I tend to do all or nothing and black & white...he does this motion of putting his hands together...so I'm hanging in there! thanks again WePow