My Support Forums - View Single Post

(JD) · Sep 04, 2011, 08:49 AM

Rap, I've had a really tough year myself so far... and apologize for not being able to keep up with the few strong friendships I have here... you included.

Yes, learning to be alone... well... even after an abusive relationship, one still longs for contact and discussion. Try and recall just how much of that you did not have nor want when married? The mind tends to recreate and recall only the "good" stuff. Ha. I have a dog. I know you love animals and that is probably a huge loss and void to you, moreso than a man.

I'm still not "used" to being alone. It's been 17 years since my divorce... and the only person who touched me with caring (other than my physical therapist) died last year. Oh and my colleague therapist let me hug him once after my mom died 2 1/2 years ago. :sobbing:

When I was totally healthy " " I looked at each change in life as the next step or a new adventure... one that was welcomed with eagerness and anticipation. When we are less than healthy, it's difficult to find that attitude.

What I find best is not to dwell upon it. Maybe feel remorse or such over a cup of coffee or tea, and when that's empty, I'm done focussing on the topic.

It's so good to hear from you. I wish you well in pursuing that final licensure...it IS worth the effort... keep trying.

Maybe you could talk with your landlady and make plans to have brunch once a week or two weeks? You can maybe tell her you don't know how to live alone, and does she have any suggestions she can share at that time???