Hi, I too notice things with my son - his shyness, his deepness, his fury and sadness and how he can remember hurt and pain for a long time.

I questioned myself - I didn't want him to have the same experiences as I had, I wanted it to be different for him. But then I realised the things that happened to me as a child, did just that - happen to "me" - those things did not give me the ability to feel pain deeply, I had that capacity anyway.

My emotions were denied as a child and this is what I can do differently for my son. When he cries, when he is angry, when he is feeling shy, I can be there for him, empathise and give him what I did not have - validation, warmth, love, a hug.

Your T sounds great actually - what a difficult challenge to hear though - that he was reacting but not in the way you wanted - sounds like there is much to learn from that.

Take care - Soup