Ok, so here I am, again. Posting again. Not knowing what to say again. And Hateful doesn't really even apply here. I am so tired of everything right now and I just want to go away. It gets on my nerves so much because I have all this good stuff going on in my life, but I can't seem to enjoy anything. I know that I should be happy, but should and reality are two different things. I put on this fake happiness, so good at it, and it's not real, I am only real at home, and even then sometimes i pretend. It's so stupid....I'm so stupid. I hate this...I hate the way I am. It makes me so mad. *sigh*

[b] I used to be so big and strong I used to know my right from wrong I used to never be afraid, I used to be somebody, I used to have something inside now it's just this hole that's open wide, I'll cross my heart I'll hope to die, but the needle's already in my eye, what I used to think was me is just a fading memory....--NIN [b]