It sounds like you have not really confered with a therapist that specializes in your disorder. What you are discovering is an awareness that your behavior patterns are changing and even causing damage, but you cannot fix them yourself.

The first part of healing is recognising that you do have issues that you cannot seem to change or understand on your own. So be thankful for that. But the important step is in getting guidance and real therapy for this.

Any kind of psychological frustration can lead to a type of depression. And that happens because it can be both physically and psychologically exhausting to deal with the instability issues that are present.

Be glad that you are consciously aware there is an issue because it is important that you recognize you are somehow struggling. But I cannot say enough that is important that you seek out professional guidance to get you on the right track to learning what you are addressing and how to learn ways to resolve these issues.

Open Eyes