You have your whole life ahead of you. How do you know you are the only woman this man has shown his childhood haunts to? Did he tell you that in addition to telling you he didn't want you to be his girlfriend? Yet you are having sex with this man? You call yourself a loner. I say this with respect: decide in your own mind what you want and then accept no less. If you want a loving, exclusive relationship with someone who will identify as boyfriend don 't accept anything less. There are many men (and women, don't want to be sexist) who will not only take and take and take from others, but some who will deliberately maneuver others into giving them what they want (sex, money, attention) with no intention of forming a loving bond. If you want a loving bond, accept nothing less.