This is a very interesting thread, with some truly insightful comments. I too have struggled many times to regain the faith and affection of people who seemed to dismiss me and move on, seemingly, without much thought, while I "wallowed" in it, much longer than the average person, questioning and berating myself for my shortcomings, for not being good enough. I have often marveled at how quickly other people can move on.

Well, I learned to change this kind of thinking, over much time and hard work, and you, Richardrahl, can grow and change also. I've learned to be kind to myself, and allow myself to move on and experience life, rather than spending inordinate amounts of time and effort on people who have dismissed me, who don't need or want me.

I like the analogy that Open Eyes gave of learning a new language. I often likened it to baby steps, often with some backsliding, but eventually reaching my goal. I wish the same for you!

Oh, and what Moonbeam2 said, "Reach for the hand that reaches back!"