(((((((Stoda)))))))
I am so sorry that you have experienced that, please do not blame yourself in any way. I did that myself and I didn't talk about it for many years. You really do need to find someone to talk to and no, you don't have to announce to anyone that you are a survivor of a rape. You are only just beginning that path, you need to go slow and be with a very supportive and understanding therapist. And you definitely need to be quietly validated and supported on a path of slowly healing and even morning it. I had to do that by myself, and I didn't really do it, I tryed to pretend it didn't happen and that was not good, I held in too many emotions not realizing it. You do have to let your feelings out and be validated.
We are always here to listen and give hugs.

Open Eyes