Tsunami, it sounds like you're having a very negative episode... who can you talk to in real life who couuld help? I know it might be hard to hear, but perhaps the doctor could help. I know when I get to where you're at I'm usually on the way to becoming very unwell.

Hang on, and let us know what's going on. You mightn't be able to get to Bible study, but with your permission I'll pray for you. Stay safe.