What you're feeling is very familiar.

Glad you're here for support. Idk what to say that would help.

Talking to a therapist might help a lot. Or even just make a call to the suicide hotline & hear a real voice - a voice that will not judge or pressure you.

Confession at church may feel good too. Maybe they have ppl at church that can give you more help with your parents and take some of the pressure off you. Taking care of elderly parents is soooo hard. It's like you have no life of your own and you're rearing children. Reverse parenting. Been there & harbor similar guilt.