Hello Rohag,

Thank you for your suggestions. I checked into the United Way 211, they don't have service in my area. In this area, everyone refers back to the mental health center. I called the suicide hotline here, the woman actually told me I should go buy drugs to manage my depression.

As for reporting them, the local news channel ran my story, it made no difference. I also contacted the California Govenor. He made contact with mental health who lied to the Governor. Mental health lied saying that they would give me services, but that I just didn't want to come in. So getting the letter saying all I need to do was come in, I made a trip down there. When I got down there they said the only help they would give me was budgeting help.

The help? They want me to give up my car, shut off my basic cable tv, cancel my internet and everything else except for rent, electric and food and use what's left to pay for therapy. What good is therapy is the other 6 days and 23 hours of the week is spent looking at 4 walls because you have nothing at home to keep your mind occupied.

I was able to locate a therapist by chance. I was checking out a news website that was running a story about a therapy center 30 miles away that just got a $10,000.00 dollar grant and was accepting new patients. So instead of having to come up with $150.00 per week for sessions, I just had to find gas money. I can at least make it once a month, sometimes twice a month. Once or twice a month over nothing at all for 8 years, I will take it.

But the problem is, crisis still happens. I should be able to get help when the depression and suicide is out of control. I should be able to get emergency treatment like anyone else. But your right, I can't force anyone to want to help me. I just figured since the mental health psych wards caused the PTSD, they can at least fix it. Thanks for the ear though.

-Stanley