I would say, yes it's possible to be happy and not know it ... or perhaps to be in some kind of state of contentness but because it is so rare or unusual you might not realise that the state you are in is "there". If we don't know what something looks like how do we know that we've arrived there? At the same time, just because it's possible doesn't mean it is true for you and if you are feeling depressed that doesn't seem to be the case here I hope your T can clarify this better and also explain the comments about commitment; it sounds to me like all you are doing including seeing a T is part of just such a commitment