Xando, it will get better over time. You will look back and smile. Now, I feel so glad I had "my good girly" for 6 years. If you have the resources and energy, it makes good sense to put your love in a direction where it is very needed. The good you will do can be, in part, a memorial of the bond you had.

I washed a kitchen wall that was in great need of cleaning.
I left the television turned off for a good portion of the day.
I listened to some great vinyls from my father's record collection, while cleaning, and thought fond thoughts of him.
I kept going doing constructive things around my place.
I put a call in with a message that my pdoc call me back.
I ended the day with a spa-style bubble bath - candles and music. (A great comeback from the pit I was in early today.)
I read something worthwhile.