Not being able to experience emotions is like looking at a blande tv show with no substance . . . . it's empty buckets in the rain . . . . it's oceans with no waves . . . . a summer with no breeze . . . . . .

Have you ever been somewhere and nowhere at the same time? Looked at life and wondered what you are looking at? Sat in the warmth of the sun and couldn't feel it?

T says it's a defense mechanism and not to fight it. It's there for a purpose. I guess I've just gotten too good at it over the years. I've placed everything behind glass walls - bullet proof, sound proof walls. He says it will lift - I wonder. It's been several days. Not that I haven't experienced this before. I have. Maybe it came back because of the death of my friends son. I'm going to go and see her later today and take some things to her. Just stuff that might make things easier. I don't know what else to do. I feel so helpless right now. Out of touch with everything. Blah!

I just needed to vent.

Anne