Was up just about all nite having anxiety My mind was thinking away of what the nite had in store for me. I took a nice warm shower then listened to some enya. I started to feel sleepy and my eyes were getting heavy I wanted to lay down and go to sleep but was scared too. I kept telling myself to not be afraid to accept the nightmare to let it happen feel it confront it and try to learn from it I did end up drifting off into sleep. at some point it all started again I was screaming for help and no one heard me. I screamed God its happening again I cant take it much longer I ssen and felt everything all over and was sobbing away I woke up breathing real fast and was soaked in sweat I was shaking away and realized no one heard me when i screamed for help cause it was another nightmare. Thease nightmares that always seam so real and scare the heck out of me. What I wouldnt give to have a peacefull nites sleep again. The nightmare have gotton alot more intense and are alot more frequent. I know there has to be things that need to be resolved I have no idea what that may be but Im starting one on one again to help deal with it. I may end up having to be on meds again which i dont want to be on but if i need it to help me deal i will take it I got so much guilt and so much hurt i dont know where to go with it or who to turn to besides my therapist. There's so much more I wanna say but dont know if i really should