You should really talk to a doctor ASAP. Quitting meds without a doctor's supervision can be dangerious, and also it seems like you have pretty concrete plans to end your life. This is serious stuff you know? I can relate to wanting to die one moment and thinking of your job the next. But still having a plan mean syour suicdal thoughts ar epretty bad. Even in an impulse you could die. You may need to be put back on meds. So please talk to a doctor.