I think I know how she feels. I'm all about the concept of tough love, but I felt very similar when my husband was at rock-bottom. Showing tough love is perfect in theory but I couldn't figure out the logistics of making it work. Exactly how do you kick someone you love out of your house? I mean, precisely how do you do it, when they don't want to go? Do you put their stuff in garbage bags on the front lawn and change the locks? And how do you deal with the risk that you might stumble over them sleeping on the sidewalk a few weeks later?

I'm not saying that tough love shouldn't be done. I'm just saying that there is a huge grey area between the concept and putting it into action. If somebody could have helped me work out a set of practical steps, I would have gladly done it, but having people tell me that I "should" kick him out for his own good wasn't getting me any further along than I had previously been.

Hence feeling "trapped". Of course, I don't know if that's how Wisewoman feels, but that's how I felt.