I dont know if you really want advice or not but I think what I have to say might help. The thoughts you're having about your husband are called 'obsessive thoughts'. I used to suffer badly from them. I'm 21, so Im not much younger than you. I know how awful they can be. They're terrifying and exhausting. You may not know this, but those thoughts are actually a part of the disorder OCD. I've had them ever since I was 9 and when I got on the medication I'm on *poof* they disappeared. I'm on Luvox which is an SSRI that for depression, anxiety, and OCD. It's been my savior. Feel free to email me.