Jen,

I think it's great that you are setting up healthy boundaries and speaking up about the things that you feel are unfair.
Life is about choices. I've chosen to have what I consider an equal relationship-- in regards to shared duties anyway.

We've always shared paying bills. At the moment I'm out of work-- so I do all the housework-- but when I was working, we shared household chores too ---as I see it that, if I'm working-- I'm doing the "man's" part of the relationship(bringing home the bacon)-- so it's only right for my husband to share in the "woman's" part of the relationship(household chores).

I hope things lighten up for you.... hope hubby steps in and helps you-- you're right-- you don't need FOUR kids!!
I'm here, if you need to talk.

mandy