Kind of nervous posting this here since it's admitting that I have this habit. But I've been reading a bit about Trichotillomania (maybe I shouldn't be, admittedly, but I saw an article that referred to it as "hair pulling disorder" and that instantly caught my curiosity) and now I have a question. Or a sort of question. Or something.

I've always had this odd fascination with my hair. My mother says that even when I was younger, she would often have teachers telling her that I would try to eat my hair. I don't do that any more. I cannot say why, but for whatever reason (reprimanded for it too many times, grew out of it, I don't know) I stopped doing that. However, the "fascination" with my hair did not go away.

I have two habits where it concerns my hair. The first is mostly harmless. I'll twist a lock of hair (always the front, "my bangs") around my finger. I have to do this a certain way and a certain number of times for it to feel "right". This habit is rotated between subconsciously doing it (as in I don't notice I'm doing it until someone points it out) or consciously doing it (as in sometimes I am well aware of the behavior but still cannot stop until it's done "right"). The second, however, isn't harmless. I run two fingers through my hair - it's always the same place, the "middle" of my scalp - and yank downward. This is more often than not a subconscious behavior in that I'm only vaguely aware I'm doing it and usually don't realize I've done it until the behavior is over or someone points it out. I've been doing this for five or so years now. (Since I was in my late teens, I'd estimate) I've tried shaving my head, but that doesn't completely stop the behavior as I still try to do it (even without hair there). Until this year, it didn't bother me much. But now, that particular area of my head is balding (I cover it up by wearing a sort of scene kid "fringe") and a few times, I have done it until a new bald spot formed that was literally raw. I have lain in my bed at night, on my computer... to get up and notice my pillow is filled with strands of hair. Heck, right now, I'm looking at strands of hair all over my bedsheets from tonight alone.

My question is, what kind of pulling classifies as Trichotillomania and if this sounds like it might be it? I don't know. I've never thought of it as pulling, but since I'm "pulling" strands of hair out, would it still be trich? I'm kind of anxious asking this question, I must admit. My family knows I have a weird obsession with my hair, but I've never admitted that I have a bald area in the middle of my head because of it. Any help is appreciated. Also, advice is more than welcome, as well.