I feel your pain. I almost loss everything when I got sick but I worked for the State of Michigan and got my benefits after taking the State to court. I was afraid my family would be homeless. I just sat on my porch and worried about it while chainsmoking and drinking very heavily. I ended up with a alcohol induced cardiopathy(weak heart) and now have apacemaker to keep me alive. I am ok in the morning but as the day goes on I get very anxious and tired. I lost my dad a couple years ago and it triggered an depressive state but not a long one. I take my meds and am fairly stable with hypomania. I get reviewed every year for my benefits and worry about it all the time. I am lucky because I own my house and three cars. My wife and I are still together(35 years)but I want a divorce but can not afford one. I hope things work out for you. You are not alone. We are hear to listen even if it is a rant. Goodluck.