Hi mc16136, part of me does think that T will be angry - I think that is part of the shame, but also because I didn't tell him at the time and it was probably significant to tell him then as I was struggling and it was important that he didn't push to much then. I am worried he will think he can't trust me in the future and will therefore refuse to work with me - that would devasate me, it is OK for me to want to leave him, but not for him to want to leave me. I can be braver on here - but my brain swears me to silence in that room with T.

Thanks for the bit about running to the edge of change that makes sense to me - the therory part of this T think is relatively easy isn't it? How do we transfer it to the doing bit. Take care mc16136 - Soup