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Old Sep 15, 2011, 01:10 PM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
Mental Wellness Mensch
 
Member Since: Apr 2009
Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
Posts: 3,439
Quote:
Originally Posted by unhappyguy View Post
okay, billi,

congratulations on coming out. i am sorry to hear of the divorce but, as you know, you have to be true to yourself. though male and gay, i am also a survivor of child abuse by a woman. i continue to have difficulty in my relationships with women. i seem to be a sucker for abuse. i understand your fear of relationships and gayness. my only recommendation is that you go slowly and seek therapy. end your current relationship first. proceed slowly with your lesbian relationship - that way you can develop trust. the effects of childhood abuse are devastating. but, some of us can still succeed in relationships. and, you have met someone special(!!). proceed at your own speed and, all the best to you!

thanks.

My current relationship has ended; divorce proceedings going, Dane is gone, and I think I almost went to De on the rebound. But I realized what was happening. I ended *that* yesterday. She and I are still friends and we visit, but I have given up romantic stuff now until I heal.

I am seeing a therapist now, ordered by my new doctor; I hope I can talk to him about s*x; so far I can't. I tried to bring it up last week and I sensed he was uncomfortable, so I may have to comb for another therapist who can deal with it. Also, my mentor has been extremely supportive; he is also gay and he has also given up s*x until he is better.

Billi
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The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!