nervous
I know this must be really difficult for you to talk to your boyfriend about but having a child or deceiving him by going on the pill would be even more difficult. you need to sit down and have a discussion with him about it. if he truly loves you, as somebody prepared to have a family with you would, he would be open to having this type of conversation. for you to have a child at this point would be very detrimental to your mental health and is not a place a parent needs to be to raise a healthy child. our children can only be as healthy as we are and if we arent doing well our children cannot do well either. your boyfriend certaining would not want this for his child, would he? tell him he needs to wait for a time where you feel you are healthy enough to give your all to raising a kid, a healthy happy kid, now is just not the time.