I second turquoise' question. Is there a reason you are you still in that environment.
I lived in a situation that made me so helpless and distressed. I lived with in-laws in another country. They were so negative and downright mean to each other and I ended up having a couple breakdowns and cutting myself.
That led to me being diagnosed with BPD. Granted the cutting and breakdowns showed that I was not mentally/emotionally OK. BUT, the attitude of the family I was living with was the catalyst to my undoing.
Do you have a therapist?

Z