I am sorry, OpenEyes, to discover that you are hurting like this. You are caring of others, but you are in need of caring. Wish that "caring" could fix more problems. Still, it is good to be cared about and you must know how very much your friends here do care.

There are good recommendations above. I do know that attorneys are tricky to deal with. Your case is important and you deserve responsible, professional help. The pony being lose must have been an awful worry. I hope it is alright.