Great feedback already. @Sunna...It's the fact that I don't know HOW to let it go. Even when I TRY to stop thinking, my brain NEVER shuts down those bad thoughts. No matter what. Maybe I'll be good for a day or so, but it never lasts. Which brings me to ECHOES...I can NOT find a therapist that I feel is trying to help me. I always get the ones where I tell them what's going on and they just say "oh yeah, you're right" or suggest stupid things like tapping exercises and crap. I can't do those things because I already DOUBT that anything will work. Same with hypnosis and all. Then the ones that seem good aren't taking my insurance or there's some other freaking issue to cause a road block for me. My search continues though.

I don't want to be like this, but it's been this way for so long...reaching out to everyone with no one to reach back. I can't even have a healthy relationship with someone else because of this. I have to consciously work at it everyday. These people MADE this way and I suffer EVERYDAY. So, why do they get off so easy?