Dave, I am so sorry. I wish we could give you that spark, or ray of hope, but you need to find it within. You have such talent and are very intelligent.
I know things are very bad and will get worse before it changes. Please try to hang in there. I can relate to the way time just flies by.............I had 2 days off and I can barely remember what I did, except sleep alot. Now it's back to work.
For what it is worth, I'm praying for you, praying for that sign to come out and show you what an incredible person you are.
Mary Alice