Wow, I feel so much like I have company on my journey now. I am glad I looked at this thread. I have so much in my life that parallels so much here. Yet, you all, seem to be not ready to give up. MKJ32, you seem to have an underlying optimism, that shines through the disappointment. You look at the failed job as "having learned something." That is so healthy.

Like you other guys above, I look back and say "Who was that person who did all that good stuff, and where can I find her? Is she a figment of my imagination?"