Salukigirl, you are absolutely right, this was a problem before the pregnancy that has only gotten worse since.

I am trying so hard to go with my gut, the problem is I have never felt this before, so I honestly don't know if I am just being a paranoid and completely obsessed fool, it is ruining me and is so very unhealthy, not to mention if he is innocent, what this must be doing to him. I feel like such a bad person.

He does treat me very good, and outside of this, I have very little complaints about our relationship. He treats my two children as his own, and refers to them as his. All of this is why I posted to begin with, he really is a good guy, but I am constantly nagged by these suspicions and I don't know where they are coming from other than the lack of being intimate.

When he moved here, he was hit with the same unemployment issue that the rest of the country was going through, and after going through a couple of really horrid low paying jobs, he found one that has been going well and pays him something he is okay with, not entirely happy with... but it's better than the others were.

He knows that I am extremely attracted to him still; I tell him everyday how handsome he is and how in love with him I am, though I do voice my concerns related to our sex life. Numerous times I have tried having honest to goodness conversations with him about the issue, and they never go anywhere. He tells me that he doesn't know what is wrong, just that he doesn't really feel like it (yet he masturbates?), he has even said that it makes him feel bad for me. Usually on the days we talk about it he will promise that we will be together that night, but it never happens... not without me nagging him about it which makes me feel terrible.

Making time for each other isn't very hard for us, he has a set schedule at work, but it is not a typical 8-5 schedule, he has a couple of days during the week where we can spend quite a bit of time together while the kids are at school, every other weekend the kids go to their biological fathers house, and those are when we have our date nights and we will go out to dinner and a movie or whatever else sounds fun at the time, also we take 95% of our showers together so we can chit chat and have "relax" time nothing frisky though.

As you can see, we do spend quality alone time together, we do have our date nights, and I really do communicate my feelings to him, he has yet to do the same with me though. I should also point out that when I do talk to him, I do not point fingers, I do not get angry with him, and I do not try to make him feel bad... I try to keep the conversations as constructive and heartfelt as possible, I never want him feeling attacked, but it still doesn't work.

I think that is why my suspicions keep growing, I always thought that communication would be the best route to take, but when I hear no feedback, and see no attempts to try working on it, what more can I do?