People call me Bam. I was diagnosed as bipolar I last April after a manic episode and suicide attempt. I was put on an anti-depressant and a mood stabilizer. The anti-depressant triggered a psychotic episode and landed me in another psychiatric hospital after a second suicide attempt just 2 months after my first attempt. I believe I have much to learn about this illness. I experience rapid cycling and can only hope that I can shut up long enough to continue to learn and grow with my illness. I suffer from severe paranoia at night. I'm currently on respirdal and depakote and agreeably stable. I worry that the medicine is taking away from my great highs I used to have. I'm currently reading the book "Unquiet Mind" and it's giving me an interesting perspective. Although I don't think my case is as intense as the main character in the book, I feel there are similarities there in actions taken and thoughts expressed. I am on PC to get feedback from others with Bipolar as well as gain some knowledge and recommendations for reading material and blogs. I'm also interested in interacting with some like-minded people as I've felt pretty alone since being diagnosed. There is only one support group that meets in city where I live and next to zero resources. I also write a lot and thought this would be a great place to post some of the poems or other things that I've written but I'm having trouble with that since I haven't been a member for a month yet. I appreciate any feedback or reading recommendations- thanks!