Hi--you mentioned that your husband is now not like the man you married. But maybe it is only now that your are seeing his true self? Many people have a hard time being their authentic selves, even with their spouses, for fear of rejection. You also mentioned suicides in his family. How much do you know about his past and family dynamics? I feel there is something there. As for him not wanting to seek therapy because he does not want meds maybe he would be more open to talk therapy, without meds. and to get him started on that journey, perhaps a gentle heart to heart with you on what is really troubling him? When I was working with children whenever they were distressed or throwing a tantrum I tried to talk calmly to them to try to find out why they were feeling bad and it usually calmed them down. they all just wanted to be understood. I know you are under a lot of stress too but maybe it is worth a try? and maybe as he finds that opening up about his pain relieves it he will continue with the therapy? Wishing you all the best-Terry