Dear bswc. I agree with all the posts above, especially Leed's. I would say though
that my mom was in an abusive relationship, she choose to end that relationship
and began a new one. What she did was 'lay down the law' with my step dad and
let him know -NO MORE- then they got counseling. He stopped drinking and for the first time in 17 yrs gave me hugs. One would not recognize the two men, the step
dad before the ultimatum and the man afterwards. His problem was partly the drinking and partly his upbringing to view abuse as part of the male role.
I would share with you to have hope, but ONLY hope based solidly on reality and
very aggressive research and action for your best life.
wishing you all the best.
YOU deserve a better mate, whether it is a new HIM, or a new other man.