I took psych meds most of my life and know just how you feel. I discovered recently that my disconnection was created by learning to deal with being invisible. Breaking up is so painful that I don't even think I can address it as a problem. It is a defense I used to deny the hatred I felt for myself. I never made myself any promises and got just what I thought I needed. I am here to tell you that I had to learn to apologize to myself but not for myself. We all do the best we can and advice comes cheap and it is in many ways very destructive because advice usually comes from people who have a different perception about what the person is asking. Hard for the blind to lead the blind. A good counselor does not very often give advice and usually does not take any measure of credit for the patient's progress. The good ones try to help their patient to own the responsibility for their success. I found such a counselor and it took me most of my life to find her. She is a God-send. It is especially hard to learn to seek your own counsel but despite of what you feel, in the end, it IS ALL UP TO YOU. I AM 64 AND IT TOOK ALL OF MY LIFE TO GET WHERE I AM. THERE WAS A TIME WHEN I SAID THAT I WOULD NOT WISH THE MEMORIES OF MY LIFE ON MY OWN WORTS ENEMY. After I said that, I realized that that was exactly what I had done because I realized at that moment that I was mo own worst enemy. Now I finally feel that I am my own best friend. Bless you for your courage. I would like to leave thinking that I have passed a little wisdom forward. I wait for your reply.