Hi Wysteria,
I am in DBT currently and my therapist is a DBT therapist. In the program I attend they do make everyone see one of their DBT therapist for individual therapy for the sake of consistency. Luckily I started with this t and was not put in a situation where I had to change therapists. That would not have worked well for me. I am sad for you that you had to see the ice queen and she misrepresented what DBT is all about. When I grumble about DBT my t tells me it is actually the most compassionate treatment he can give me. It is nonjudgemental, non perjorative, and endlessly empathetic. The skills have saved my life. There have been many days where I go through my notebook to practice skills just to make it through the moment. Yah I must admit sitting in class learning the skills and listening to everyone else's crazy talk is annoying but it works. That way you don't have to take all your individual sessions going over these skills. There are many things that I didn't like about DBT to begin with but over time I have come to see that it really works for me. The best thing ever is that I have never been shamed by my care team for being a Borderline EVER. In fact I didn't even learn about the stigma until I came on to PC. And that speaks the most to me. I have enough shame on my own. I hope you can still keep an open mind when you go to see this new guy. If your lucky you may find a program that lets you keep your old t. Please let us know how it goes.