ya know....

i feel for your t...she will never measure up to the standard you have set for her inside your head. ever...there will always be a bar set just a little higher...

everything seems to be an issue of wanting more...& then some. yeah sure we have all googled out t's. been there done that. but it seems like you are wanting access into her life...her house...almost if you could say sorry hubby but i am moving in with my t & her family now.

do you do the same for your other medical care providers? your plumber?

of course her buttons are pushed...nothing is on her terms..it's all yours...she isn't getting the chance to set the limits at her pace of what to disclose to you...you are pushing everything.

i can see that here as well...you post it here that you do something & then wait for everyone to say it is ok & hugs & stuff...but really is it? yes if something is out on the web technically it is fair game but does that mean everyone should throw discretion out the window? & really while i think parents should protect their children on line in general i don;'t think they should have to issue specific warnings against their clients..to me that is just wrong.

i know i will get flamed for my stance but that's ok..sometimes support doesn't have to include ((((hugs))))...

i have a photo of my t. i took it in her office..but i asked. i know where she lives. she told me..last week..after 5 years of therapy..i i frequent the stores her kids work at but make it a point to not go the hours they are there (she has told me they work there) i purposely did not join her gym when i looked at gyms. she finally gave me a card with the kids pix on it last year..otherwise i never would have knows what they looked like.

curious about her life? sure..obsessed..no. if i have a question i ask. i have crossed some boundaries. she lets me know. i say i'm sorry & i learn from it.

it seems tho that you keep testing & pushing &pushing back harder...what is your t supposed to do? there is no way to win (a poor choice) or end this..except by you gaining total access to everything you need or want OR she puts up a wall & you crash & burn & cry & complain & then e mail, call cry etc & rage against it. it's a no win situation.

seems like the pattern is so fiirmly entrenched that people just get sucked into it & become enablers.

again...my take...my opinion..not right or wrong, just mine

stumpy