We're in therapy to learn about ourselves - how we interact with others and with ourselves. We might know, or think we know, why we do something but when it is about a defense we may minimize the affect our behavior has on others.

I think rainbows T might be unhappy with having her buttons pushed, but I think that primarily she wants rainbow to learn about this behavior, what it's about, where it originates, what it means, the pattern of doing something that is considered before the act to be inappropriate or wrong or unwelcome (etc) and then dismissing that effect by expecting either blanket forgiveness or anger and punishment. (I am generalizing and using words and ideas I remember from your posts, rainbow. If I'm 'off', I apologize.)
So right now it might be important to explore the effect, the fact that buttons are getting pushed and what that's about. T can absolutely handle this discussion.

Rainbow, again it is your courage and honesty that helped you arrive at this point in therapy that is so promising with the hope of learning something new and helpful.