I can't see how allowing yourself to do that will help in the least. Separating yourself from the support of family and friends, exposing yourself to the stressor of having to find sustenance and shelter on a daily basis. I have ended up homeless a couple of times & to me it was the signal of "the bottom" and I had to turn around and 'start from zero' again. I began the tendency to run when I'd barely turned 15 but for years continued reconstructing the environment which aggravated my disfunction. I hope you do well. Do things which nourish you. In retrospection, I've lived most of my life in a perhaps dissociative state which causes me to feel I have no home attachment even after living in the same spot for years. Additionally, I experience a separation anxiety which may prevent me from being "together" to someone or completely present to my partner's needs. Take a close look at yourself. You can do better for yourself and those who love you. Good luck.