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It would feel like no matter what, she can never do enough, be enough, care enough. Regardless of whether or not she complies with your request, there is always wanting more. And when she puts a boundary in place, is told that it's still not enough and she is met with anger or frustration.
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All of my Ts have told me something like the above. It's the way I feel, so is there any solution? My T is trying to build up my Self so I won't want or need her so much. She's trying to get my child parts to tell their stories of not getting loved enough and teaching me how to love them. She's trying to use EMDR to change some of the patterns. If what you quoted is true, then is it hopeless?