Is maybe a hard question? For me, I trust others but I always leave room for deceit, lies and human error.. We all make mistakes or do something wrong one time or an other. Although some do deliberately try to deceive. Sometimes they are the hardest to discover...

Guess I am trying to "figure out" aj's g/f. Not for AJ's sake, but for me and only me. I get along with her and she is fun to be around. We spent Saturday afternoon cooking a huge breakfast, "she did the cooking, I pretty much watched".. Food turned out yummmmers. She is a great little cook.. We talked and laughed and had a pretty good time...ALL was well... Everyone was happy and in a good, calm way..

Then around 10pm she vanishes for 2 hours.. AJ started to get irked and I told him to chill, that she loves to shop, give her some space... Guess if it wasn't for her history of "addictons" one would not think anything of their partner going out for several hours.. and I understood AJ's concern.

Thing is she left this cute, pink, little pencil or cosmetic brush container in the kitchen. I though oo this is soo cute and I peeked inside and what I saw shocked me. I dropped the container on the countertop as my hands were shakinking...I wanted to hide it and pretend I didn't see it but the I stink at telling lies...I opened it again and wanted to take some out and give it to AJ's dad to check it out, but again my hands were shakingi and I couldn't do it.. I knew she'd be back when when she realized she left it downstairs which in fact, I no sooner zipped it back up she was in the kitchen to get it.. My heart was pounding. I was angry.. I was scared. I didn't know what to do.....a I pretty much know what it was. I haven't said anything about it. ANd I won't, until I find it again... She comes across very convincing.. What is she doing having this stuff?

I only wished I had grabbed it and hid it outside and run to take a shower as to make it seem I wasn't in the kitchen.. Too late for that as I am not always that fast thinking when stressed or worried let alone in shock..

I can't prove anything unless I find it again.. Which, of course, I can't.. So my trust wavers back and forth... She really can be "delightful" to be around.. Her urine tests come back negative. But not sure if she is still going to the doctor.. And I don't want to be the one to create a problem, esp if I don't have evidence on hand.....

Is she pulling the wool over our eyes.. I pray she isn't..She has so many good things going for her. I think, if she is "for real and not being deceitful" would make a great partner for AJ...Although that really is none of my business... I'm just sooo confused... I want to believe her..

Trust is good.. One should never trust l00%.... Saves for a lot of heartache.. Just tallking to get stuff off my chest...