ellimay: I try to visualize my adult Self holding the baby, along with my mother and my T. I couldn't do it last session but I have been able to do it before.

I don't understand what you are saying about limits. My T set one on emails some time ago. She said she'll email me once per week, and it would be very short, and not discuss therapy. Then I decided that wasn't good for me 2 weeks ago, so I was the one to set the limit that she won't email me back anymore.

Do you mean my T doesn't set enough limits for me? My former T had many limits and it didn't help me. When I started therapy with this T, she kept telling me over and over, and still does, that if emailing her helps me to unload, it's fine. But, oh....I think I see. It is not helping me so much now, so maybe I need to write them and not send them. She suggested that as an option for me.

It is sad that the emails were an amazing gift to me in this therapy. I feel so sad not to have her emails anymore. I have at least 100 in my drawer to reread. I loved them!! Maybe I need to talk with her about that. Maybe I wasn't supposed to depend on them as much as I did? It makes me sad.

sunrise: I will try waiting before I send an email. It's always right after my session when my feelings are all stirred up. I hardly ever call her, though. It is hard to accept having NO contact between sessions. It makes me sad right now, thinking about it. I never had email privileges with my other Ts, but I was allowed to call, except for one. It was hard getting through the week when I couldn't call, with that T. I did it, though. Now it seems much harder because I know how good it felt when I emailed and my T emailed me back. But my emails were short last year. I SO wish I could have handled getting her responses and not getting upset that time. Then I wouldn't have to give them up. Thanks for your vote of confidence that I can do this. Is it worth it, though?