Thank you all for your replies. T always makes me start and since I'm forking out the cash for the 50 minutes and want the most bang for my buck I don't go for the small talk.

I have 40 minutes to decide how I'm going to start today's session. I know I'm going to go in there and launch into whatever escapes my mouth first so I don't know why I have this feeling of panic or even let my brain waste the time wishing T would start. Do you ever get tired of living in your own brain?

I better get going or I'll be late. W A I T a minute . . . maybe if I was late for the first time ever T would start . . . hmmmm I might be on to something here.