Hi,

I honestly don't know, maybe depression was meant to kill a person .. was meant to wear a person out until they couldnt take it any longer. The only thing that I can say is that if you are feeling something dont ignore it or shove it away let yourself feel it... because it will always be there just trying to come out, 2nd you are not alone never alone, find professional help someone you can talk to if you dont have anyone close to you life friends or family,

I personally cant talk to my friends or family, it is uncomfortale, so I see a therapist and it has helped me feel a little bit better.