i am so sorry but i cant seem to let this go at all i have written for hours in my journal about her saying" sorry i couldnt help you today" i just cant see how this was helpfull at all what did she hope to accomplish by saying this.i sorry it didnt seem like it was said with any kind of empathy or anything .it was stark and cold.it felt like she was angry and closing the door on me.it wasnt like maybe nextweek will be easier so we will try again .it was more like well this week sucked maybe nextime you will talk hahaha.it is all on you .im done if you want to talk great but im done.ill be here but it's on you kid.when i told her i got in trouble at work again it took so much courage.i dont think she has any idea how much.and her only responce was ,WHAT DO YOU MEAN? how do i answer that .all i wanted to say was again i got in trouble at work..i had no idea what else to say to that i could say nothing anything else was to hard and she was unintrested in helping me figure it out either.it took so much for even to say what i did and i feel like she was so invalidating and everything.WHY.she said i could go at my pace but she is angry.god i have so much overwelming anger.i'm sure she is sitting in her office thinking so smart of herself if she would ever think about me at all other than that 40 or so minutes i get.she is thinking i know she is hating herself for not talking to me and now she can suffer for it for the next two weeks.hahaha i worned her.i feel this so deeply and it hurts so bad.how can i trust someone i feel this about.but i feel this about people all the time.people are just like this.my favorite statement these days is people hurt even T's.sorry i just needed to rant .i want to end this spiral but i guess it will just take time and i need to wait it out alone as usural (i know pitty party)but it will end....