I do that, too, and want to learn to think and be mindful before I say or do anything when I'm very stressed or irritated.

I've always told people not to call me after 8 at night. If I even talk with people on the phone after that time, I get revved up and often am unable to go to sleep until the wee hours and then once I lose a night's sleep, everything gets out of kilter again. I realize I strayed off topic there. I do that a lot, but the other night, I was watching TV after 8 (in the dark, of course), and observed a bright light moving up and down slowly on my big window behind the TV from the outside patio. It continued, very slowly, moving up and down, up and down, barely making an progress toward my back door. I thought about moving toward my phone (on charge near the window) to call the police but I was irrationally afraid that if I did, someone or something would leap through the big window and attack me. Very slowly, the light continued in its gradual movement. Was it going toward the door? Finally, the doorbell rang its terrifying buzz. Scared me to death, let me tell you. I yelled out, "Who is it!?" A friend of mine responded, "It's me. I was worried about you since we haven't talked in several days."

Well, she knew I had been in a bad place for the past several months, but she could've called me in the daytime, and I was suddenly furious. I calmly but loudly said, "Well, I'm alive. Go home." She said, "I tried to call you tonight, but you didn't answer." I realized that I had my phone on vibrate because I had been somewhere and needed to silence it and had forgotten to return it to loud. I told her that and apologized.

She left and I gave her time to get home before I decided I needed to tell her how I felt. MISTAKE. I called her and asked her why she felt led to come to my house at such a time. She told me because she was worried about how I was doing because she knew I wasn't in a good place and she hadn't talked to me since Saturday (this was now Tuesday or Wed). I told her I felt she really didn't want to know how I was doing because she never asked me how I was doing -- or how I'm feeling (She doesn't). She told me she disagreed with me. That made me crazy. I asked her how she could disagree with my feeling.