Sorry i ran out of room too. I'm on a little phone that cuts me off for some reason. But i know i wrote a lot up their but there is more to it than that. I feel fake again at times which tears me apart at times, i'm trying to be ok and shrug it off but That's what i always do. I have tried best to be happy for birthday rather than trying to balance why i was born or still around. I think That's an improvement but still i feel i guess what some call a void with in. It's not like i expect anything and my boyfriend tries but he just has a bad memory and some times is too quick to get something i appreciate him so much to be honest i'd be good just hanging with him all day but we have to work this month last month we had a mini lay off, so i understand i keep remembering my 21st birthday lol i sat with my bong smoking all day by myself Lmao i laugh cause how sad. This is my 25th my insurance for car should be cheaper right lol. Sigh i also realized today i've always hid my birthday from my buds when i use to hang with some. I feel like a jerk to me. sorry there's too much and i wonder off on other things. Well thanks all for just allowing for me to post hope ya all have a wonderfull day.