I don't make enough for rent, utilities, car insurance, loan repayments, bills, and health insurance, I know that. I'm trying to work, but I'm afraid I won't be able to keep it up, I don't know, I'm so tired I don't have the energy and I really just want to be dead so how am I supposed to deal with extra trouble. Maybe they think my rent is too much, that I should be living lighter, but I can't just live any place alone, and roommates are so much stress. This place is safe, and nice, helps me feel more positive, some... and it's not like it's expensive. It's just not the cheapest apartment rate... the ones I saw for less didn't feel safe... and I had to move right away. I don't know, I'm rambling, I hate life.